For some reason I only get the urge to write when I am traveling or when I am sad. That’s just terrible. I am either seeing the world or moping on my couch in my pajamas. I seriously need to change that. I feel most alive when I am traveling to far away places. I write to remember all the places I visit. I write when I am sad to try to make some sense of how I feel. I guess it’s my way to grieve. I want to start writing about my happy so if my kids ever read my ramblings they know that I have lived a happy life.
I am almost always happy. I am pretty sure that most people I know would agree. I have a great family, live in a great city, and have lots of friends. I know I am blessed. But life is never always happy. There are always times in your life when things decide to all go wrong. When you feel like you can’t catch a break. That time for me is right now. My health isn’t ideal (not super sick but not 100% by any means). My job situation isn’t great. I have some issues in a friendship. It all hurts but I know these feelings are temporary. I have to hope that hard times exist to make sure you appreciate the good times. Everyone grieves differently. Everyone deals with sadness differently. Everyone deals with disappointment differently. I no longer want to be in this sad cycle so its time for me to fight to get me out of it.
- Assess your sources of pain and attempt to come up with a plan to fix them.
- Health – I have Hashimoto’s Disease. It’s new so it will take a few months to get back to normal. It makes me tired, gain weight, and it completely dried out my hair/skin.
- Work – I just finished up an old job. It’s just so weird. My boss and I had a disagreement then slowly there was less to do. Seeing as how we were friends for 15 years you would think we could talk it out. Some people are weird and just want to avoid issues. I still get emails from the job, I just have no tasks. So strange. Luckily I found a new side project working with someone who is a good person. It’s only temporary but at least it is something to do.
- Focus on what’s going right –
- This is easy for me right now. MY FAMILY is going right. My husband is being supportive. My kids are being kinder to each other (baby steps….). I am so close to my kids. I am literally the luckiest person on the planet to have a twin and little sister that just get me and love me. I am super close to my nieces. I love them like I love my kids and for that I am grateful.
- I have friends that noticed something was wrong and are reaching out. I didn’t say anything to them and they noticed. How lucky am I.
- Exercise – My thyroid, the holidays, then a terrible cold has made my routine workouts a little less routine. I am getting back into my rhythm and it is remarkable how good it makes me feel better.
- Hobbies – Sometimes you just need to get your mind off things. I have been crafting and decorating and that is good for the soul. Maybe I should start reading again too.
Update: I started writing this about a month ago but had to stop for some reason. I just saw the unfinished writing and as I reread it, I realized just how accurate it is. I am not completely back to normal but I feel like I am on the upswing and that feels good. I am going to keep on fighting and hopefully soon I will be feeling great (just in time for summer).
TEA RECOMMENDATIONS: None I suppose. I have been sticking to my favorites. The ones that make be feel relaxed and happy. Perhaps I be suggesting a teeth whitener instead. I think my tea obsession is staining my teeth.
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